bits and pieces

I can feel the anorexia setting in again. With a side effect of depression, no matter what I’m doing I feel stuck. I just stare at something, anything, frozen in place wherever I am. Because right now absolutely nothing makes sense except for what I eat or not eat. I’m in full hunting mode, taking care of the immediate problem in front of me and not thinking beyond that. Thinking beyond takes too much energy and it’s too foggy so like a true perfectionist, I don’t know where to begin. So I’m stuck in Groundhog Day, solving the same old problems I’ve always had like it’s my passion, proficiency, and profitability all rolled into one. I’m that horse circling round and round, getting thirsty, but instead of drinking the water like the logical thing to do would be, I keep circling. Like a hawk about to make a kill, only I never do.

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5 thoughts on “bits and pieces

  1. I hear you. Trying sleeping a lot and then waking up and calling someone on the phone before you’re really awake. Someone you haven’t talked to in a long time. I think that will help.

  2. Boo, boo, this has me concerned. Whatever you are going through, Gordon has a good idea in that talking to someone might help. Someone you trust.
    I can identify with the stuck feeling. It’s a difficult place to be. Hugs, boo. Take care of yourself. 💙

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