wyrd

I don’t know what to say except for life is hard. For as long as I am breathing and my eyes are open, there’s something to do, some business to take care of. I guess in the end that’s a good thing because you never want life to get boring. But it’s also an exhausting way to live. I don’t know if the way I choose to live my life is making it exhausting, I just know there are some days when I wish I can take one day, just one day, and figure everything out about my life for the rest of my life. I never do and I think I need to every once in a while check in with myself and take a whole day off and figure some things out if I can’t figure everything out. Maybe that’s what I need to do, but I never do it. It seems whether I like it or not, I’ve put my brain on some sort of survival mode. As if I’m programmed just to solve the problem right in front of me and not plan for anything. But that’s so not it either because I have several planners to help me shape my future. I think I just get too distracted too easily and then time runs out and I mess something up that messes up the plan.

EDIT:

I made those words before COVID-19 has forced as all to be hermits. Now that it has forced me as well, I think I may have gotten my wish. Isn’t life weird like that? And this time I mean weird, as in wyrd, as in fate. So I guess this means watch out! You don’t know what’s coming up next on this blog of mine. I may have some life-changing news to share soon. Or…you may still see my confusing self trying to make sense of it all. Either way, here’s hoping this time in isolation will help us all grow into decent human beings.

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