I miss you, Dad.

I looked up the word ‘languid’ today and I remembered that I had looked it up before. But because I don’t really have an opportunity, especially nowadays, to use words in sentences that I just looked up in conversation with people I know, it’s hard for me to lock down the definition and usage of the word. I guess you could kind of say I am languidly learning the definition of languid? I don’t know. It just makes me think of you, Dad. You once told me to look up every single word I don’t know the meaning of in the dictionary. I’ve noticed myself able to do that, but the words don’t stick because I don’t get to use them so I end up with my nose in the dictionary again, looking up words I’ve looked up before. Does this ever happen to anyone else? How do I truly learn a new word? It feels like everyone else just magically has words up their sleeve while I’m stuck here furtively pulling out my pocket dictionary like a word magician or something. Le sigh. Dad I miss you. There aren’t enough words in the English language for me to pull out the right one from the dictionary to describe how I miss you and how often and when.

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