It’s storming outside and I just ate eight strawberries. I’m trying to keep my thoughts company, but the strawberry seeds are getting stuck in between my teeth. I keep pacing the room like I’m mulling over a Calculus problem, but the truth is I haven’t looked at a Calculus problem in over 16 years. The sound of the rain against the window makes me want to take a shower. I check my phone and notice I have 72 new e-mails. There’s half of a Michelle Branch stuck in my head now and it’s telling me only crazy people fall in love with me. So I do what any insane person would do: I hop in the shower.

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