What a week. I don’t know where to start. I don’t know if I should start. It has been one of those weeks that was like a traffic jam and Groundhog Day all rolled into one. When you get stuck in a traffic jam and the highway turns into a parking lot, all you can do is watch the lanes next to you to see if any of them are going faster than yours. Then you try to squeeze into one of those lanes and go along that lane for as long as the road allows before merging onto the lane you have to merge onto. You keep doing this until you reach the end of the traffic jam and can go as freaky fast as you normally can on the highway again. Sounds simple, right? It basically is, but if you were sitting in my passenger seat, you would be impatiently waiting for me to change lanes until we were both heating up and can’t breathe. I drive Lara Jean Covey style and sometimes, just sometimes, I wish I had a Peter Kavinsky in my life to improve my driving game or drive me to places I’m too scared to drive to myself or understands that I don’t like driving in the snow or on icy roads. I really do. Traffic jams give you no choice but to wait it out or figure out how to slowly get to where you want to go. If you want to move along, it is up to you to move into the moving lane.
When you get stuck inside Groundhog Day, you just drive yourself crazy trying to get out, but realize you can’t. You try anyway, try to reason with the people around you, but they still see things the way they do and you still see things the way you do and that’s that. You tell yourself to let it go and magically, you feel okay again. Until you hit another confrontation and your world seems to turn upside down for a minute and you ride that Möbius strip again. Sometimes, just sometimes, I want to pull a Kelsey and Liza moment and go inside a soundproof wine vault and scream my head off until I feel better again before entering back into the world.
This is the kind of end to April I have had. Happy May Day.