Fear makes you late to your dentist appointment. You overthink every little thing you are going to say to the receptionist. Perfectionism is on your brain and you can’t snap out of it. Then the receptionist asks you how you are doing and you word vomit all over her so now you just have this pile of spitball slush that you can’t clean up because you don’t have a word mop for all the English papers that come flying out of your mouth.
After the appointment you have a second pile of spitball slush waiting to be fired out to your next target because you just learned something new. The question is, who is going to be your next target? You contemplate talking to Nala, but she’s been cranky for demanding an earlier feeding time since 6:00 a.m. when you crawled out of bed to attempt to not be late to your dentist appointment. Now that it’s 10:00 a.m. she’s not ready for your spitball slush – female feline needs to eat!
The text rolls in and already you’re overthinking your response to a ding you can only hear and not see. It’s almost your feeding time so you decide to grab lunch first and make it to your next Saturday appointment before having a picnic in your car to guarantee that this time you will be punctual. You get there early instead and perfectionism kicks into gear again. In six months you get to battle with fear again, only by then, you will have taken 500 naps to prepare for the moment you walk into the dentist’s office.
The sun had finally set. The day was finally over. All was quiet – until that fateful knock at the door…I froze in the middle of doing the dishes and Mom looked up. Two women were standing on our front porch and they were the kind of women not welcome inside our home, the Belle Watlings of the world. We were perturbed, for there really was no reason for these kinds of women to be coming to our house. Who could they be?
All we knew was they drove a white van and they were looking for something. Or someone…We didn’t answer the door and in a few boring minutes, they walked back to their van, pulled out some paper which I’m assuming has directions, then pulled away.
I finished the dishes and kept thinking about where these women came from and where they were headed. A dinner party? No, that can’t be right. Unless it was Great Gatsby style, there’s no way they were going to a dinner party dressed like that. Were they looking for people to convert? Ha! Unless it was some Magic Mike religion, there’s no way they were evangelists.
Whatever these women were up to, they were long gone now and on their way to the Right Place. For their sakes, I hoped they got there.
We are all doctors. I’m having anxiety over having anxiety. This diagnosis happened only because I was scrolling through Facebook and I found a list a Friend had shared over the symptoms of anxiety. I have every single one of them and then I became anxious reading over the list. Then I laughed at this silly exercise because maybe I don’t have anxiety at all and am only suffering under Med School Reading Anxiety. You read about a disease in a book and from the listed symptoms think you have that disease because you are exhibiting those symptoms. Does that make us all doctors if we can read? Yeah, I’m probably anxious. It’s making me antsy just thinking about possibly having anxiety vs. possibly suffering under Med School Reading Anxiety. Maybe I’m looking into this too much. Maybe I have something totally different. I don’t know what that is exactly, but I do have a vague idea. Only I don’t know what it’s called. Hypochondriac comes to mind. Don’t get me wrong though. That’s NOT the same thing as Med School Reading Anxiety. Now I think I’m just suffering under Verbosity. Oi. This is me having anxiety over having anxiety.
What a shock it is when you find out an actor wasn’t acting in a movie like he is in real. But it’s a good kind of shock because that means he’s a talented actor to be able to play a character so different from who he is as a person. This is especially true if he’s convincing on screen. Now I’m no movie expert, but I don’t see how there exists certain criteria you use to measure an actor’s greatness on screen. An actor’s greatness is measured by the number of viewers crying at the end. An actor’s greatness is measured by the number of empty popcorn tubs. An actor’s greatness can be discovered in viewers’ reactions. An actor’s greatness is seen through how many lives are touched. An actor’s greatness is reported by the media. But as I look over my definitions of an actor’s greatness I notice a couple using numbers, suggesting that an actor’s greatness can be measured like weight or height. Maybe it’s not so much the actor, but the quality of the movie in those cases that is actually measured. And maybe there’s the Oscars and ratings online and stars and all that jazz, but I really think an actor’s greatness is just a feeling, something you just know to be true. No numbers, no words. An actor’s greatness is simply felt.
Sunday, January 7, 2018 – Webster House: It sounds like some dictionary house, but it is a restaurant and shop where the Nerdy 30s gals got to celebrate one whole year of existence. (Since then it has been a little over two years.) The meals are on the pricey side here, but they do have herbed potatoes that are worth getting an extra side for. I would recommend this place for special occasions. I mean, there’s a coat check service and you can reserve separate rooms for your party with each room decorated with walls of different themes. The one we had our party in was a library theme so the walls look covered in bookshelves, which was cool.
We had a little recognition ceremony for the Assistant Organizers. These ladies plan events and lead them in different areas like book club, brunch, escape rooms, DIY events, movies, winerys, deep thoughts, and more. Without them we would not be able to have all the fun experiences around Kansas City that we do! They went home with some of the first prizes and gifts. Then we played a Two Truths and a Lie game. This was my first time playing it, but we each received a sheet with all of our individual statements and had to guess which one was the lie for each girl. Whoever had the most points at the end got to pick a prize first. I got to take home a striped notebook labeled “notes” and I was happy about that. Then we had prizes for the most active members. An organization that meets regularly is nothing without its regular attenders. Next we played a Nerdy 30s Trivia Game. It’s exactly as it sounds: we identified nerds based on facts like the youngest member in attendance and the nerd who hates spiders. Those who got the most number of questions right could select a prize first. At the end we had door prizes. I still have my games to this day.
This anniversary party was by far the most fun I had at a Nerdy 30s event up until that point and it will definitely stand out in my memory for a while. I was looking forward to our anniversary party this year, but sadly I was snowed in that day and couldn’t make it out. Next year!
I’m looking through a list of not so famous last words and am surprised to see “What duck?” on it. I’m trying to imagine what that line means exactly. Only I can’t because I keep coming up with nothing. This must be some duck if it contributed to someone’s last words. I’m imagining one that is a giant and wears a combat helmet and barks orders. That’s the first thing I think of, and it didn’t come to me right away. My second thought is a normal-sized duck that runs around and bites people. I just don’t know if one is vicious is enough to kill a human being. Plus that behavior reminds me more of a goose than a duck. Duck, duck, goose! Or maybe this duck is supposed to be a metaphor or something. Nah. That can’t be right. Whatever it is, this duck came as a surprise, messed up someone’s plans, thus ending their life. o.O It doesn’t seem to have a sense of humor either. I hope I never run into this duck…
What if you could plant an animal and raise a plant? No rules, just straight up it would work. No logistics, just straight up animals growing up in a garden with roots and all. They could run around like their usual animal selves, but somehow they’d be planted on land at the same time. No sunshine necessary, just straight up plants staying grounded, yet mobile all over the land and sea. Like an oxymoron of sorts? I’m not sure that is the right word, but you know what I mean.
If these things were possible we could re-shape farm life. (Obviously.) But maybe plants and animals wouldn’t even be considered part of farm life anymore. These new organisms would become part of a brand new world. Plants and animals would serve different functions than they do now. What that would be I really don’t know…yet…