“The Secret Society of Success: Stop Chasing the Spotlight and Learn to Enjoy Your Work (and Life) Again” by Tim Schurrer

I am so grateful to have read The Secret Society of Success: Stop Chasing the Spotlight and Learn to Enjoy Your Work (and Life) Again by Tim Schurrer. I, like many of my co-workers now and in the past, have at one point or another faced the challenges of success in corporate America. On top of that, it’s not just success in corporate America. There are pressures everyone faces when trying to take on the world’s definition of success.

Welcome to the Secret Society. We’re all used to the idea that to be somebody in this world we must find a way to get noticed by our superiors and get promotion after promotion until we’re at the top of the ladder. But what if the actual definition of success has nothing to do with stepping into the spotlight? What if it has everything to do with adding value to a team and not worrying about things like getting credit? What if success is not the number of records you sell or how many fans you have?

Through examples of members of the Secret Society from some you have heard of like LeBron James, Fred Rogers, and Scott Hamilton, along with some you have never heard of, Schurrer presents a new way of finding your life purpose, no matter where you are in your life right now. Without the man who helped the shuttle stay in orbit, Neil Armstrong would not have been able to be the first man to walk on the Moon. Without the woman who created a series of theater games, there’d be no such thing as improv comedy. Yet we don’t know the names of these successful people.

It’s easy to go into situations wondering if you’ll get anything out of it, but Schurrer reminds us that that mindset will not bring the fulfillment we are looking for. Chasing after fame and money can ultimately ruin your mental health and isn’t worth it in the end. This may not be news, but Schurrer provides examples from his own life and friends’ lives that explains exactly why this is true. It’s a different way to define success and one that can potentially save a life.

After reading Schurrer’s book, I have learned so much about not only my role at work, but my whole outlook on life. But best of all, I also learned about what goes on behind-the-scenes of professional football team practices, domestiques in cycling, and the world of lobsters. All of these stories helped shape my understanding of the Secret Society and made the process fun. Give it a try. You have more value than any job title could ever give you.

written on the face

It was like a cheer squad that deliberately didn’t pay attention to their captain. A fist bump that turned into a high five over a bridge of connecting waters. Cod flying through the air and landing on the plate, fully cooked. A poem recitation in front of a class, mostly asleep. It was like gnats hanging around a background of green, hoping to fly into a window. Telling embarrassing stories from a past that doesn’t feel like your own to a couple of strangers so you remove the masking tape from your mouth. Tasting a bomb pop for the first time. Running through the sprinklers after a late night of dancing. It was like getting a text back.

tardy

Hit snooze because you don’t want to face everybody’s demands for the day yet. Hit snooze again just in case you fall back asleep after the podcast finishes playing. Open your eyes, but lay there scrolling through your phone to find one more funny video to distract you from all you have to do for today. Just one more until you are left with no time to make it before traffic starts.

“sorry, we tried” intro

The neighbor’s dog snuck into the photo like it wanted to be a part of our family and not his owner’s anymore. After the shot we tried telling him to “go home,” but huskies don’t listen well. It started to turn around when it came charging back and tripped my mother, causing her to land on her back. From that day on we knew we were cat people.

“The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue” by V. E. Schwab

What does it mean to be free? Addie LaRue finds out the hard way when she prays to the gods that answer after dark in V.E. Schwab’s The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue. It is 1714 France and all Adeline wants is to be able to have her own say in who she will or will not marry, but instead is granted her wish of freedom in the form of always being forgotten. For the next 300 years, people will meet Addie, but then in a blink of an eye, forget who she is. Then, out of nowhere, someone remembers her in 2014 New York City and she cannot for the life of her figure out why.

No one likes being forgotten, even in a world where there is no curse. Everyone likes being understood and seen for who they really are. But if you were Addie, what would you do? How would you live your life? Is it much of a life at all? I’m amazed she made it through a year, let alone 300! I love Schwab’s imagination. I can’t imagine describing to someone what it’s like to be forgotten over and over again, but Schwab does it so convincingly, like you are there with Addie, like maybe Schwab really has been through what Addie has been through as well. I love Schwab’s use of similes, especially the way she anthropomorphizes different things like time or a city.

Then when Addie meets Henry Strauss, something clicks in a way it has never clicked before. Say what you will about him, but he is relatable. He is someone still in the middle of discovering himself, but who isn’t? Plus he has a cat named Book! Schwab weaves their lives together seamlessly. Are there loopholes in this curse? Henry makes you question that, but the ending is so unexpected. Schwab makes you reflect on your life and think about what is truly necessary to live. Is it better to find freedom by living in the shadows or never to be criticized again and only loved by everyone we meet?

There are times when we feel like we would love to be invisible or live a life free of criticism from the ones who love us, but something tells me maybe we don’t truly want those things in the end. Just ask Addie and Henry.

We avoid anyway.

The things we want to avoid writing about are the things we should be writing about the most. The things we want to avoid talking about are the things we should be talking about the most. The things we want to avoid doing are the things we should be doing the most. Confrontation is never desired, but is always necessary for growth. We know this, yet we don’t do this.

in-between

https://www.mcharpermanor.com/post/printable-mason-jar-for-week-6-firefly-watercolor-tutorial

the space where Freedom lives. can’t go back to a defined past. can’t move forward to an undefined future. so the present it is. where YOLO and FOMO coexist. so days are planned sans a planner. moments are captured like fireflies in a mason jar. But sooner rather than later the moments fly away. all that is left is an open jar of possibilities…

split ends

Sometimes words fail. Incessant thoughts never make it out alive. Dumbfounded takes over, commanding the face to freeze. A visual says it all. Suddenly, no words are necessary.

right?

Who doesn’t want to hide for a couple of hours? To be free of judgment and criticism and feelings and decision-making. I suppose that is why video games and drugs and novels and movies and smoking and concerts and playing a musical instrument and clubbing and karaoke and partying exists…

writing instruments

A pencil underlines the secrets we never tell about the books we like to read. It’s our own private joke with the author, meant to be dissected on the pages of our writer’s notebook. Maybe it’ll be something that’ll help us write better. Maybe it’ll be something to admire from afar. Maybe it’ll be both.

A pen scribbles on napkins the phone numbers of possible future adventures in friendship and romance. We stuff the napkin in our purse, hiding it for a quick exit, as if taking down a stranger’s number isn’t somethint we should be doing right now. We should already have friendships formed with people we love and want a part of our lives and can call at 3 in the morning if we can’t fall asleep beause we’re thinking about the chocolate cake we just threw away.

Are you a pencil or pen person?